![]() I struggled to explain what I needed at the “Help” desk, and eventually ended up in the wrong line. Under the bright fluorescent lights, I felt like I was about to collapse in on myself. In Japan, I lost a lot of that ability, especially adjusting during the first week. I realized how much of my confidence is built from the foundation of being able to communicate and understand in a language familiar to me. I did not have cell service, I did not know where to find the SIM card I had arranged, I did not know which line to go to, and a sudden blur of words in Japanese was disorienting. My first steps in Japan were fumbling my way through the Haneda airport passport area. Predictably, it did not solve all of my problems. Tokyo was magical, but for other reasons. I would instead think of Hawaii, or Japan, or somewhere people might better understand me and my background.īut ultimately one lesson I took away from my time in Japan is that idealized versions of reality rarely live up to what you imagined. When I struggled to fit in in the United States, sometimes I took comfort in thinking that perhaps my home isn’t “here,” it’s somewhere else. In some ways, my expectations for what Japan would be for me were inexorably high. Yukata, lightweight traditional clothing, worn by some in Asakusa.
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